|Posted by tmontgomer on June 13, 2010 at 3:04 AM|
I think this has been one of the toughest weeks I have had since the bar opened. I feel like this community and the people who come here are part of my family. They mean so much to me. The loss that we suffered this week has made me feel a saddness that words really can't explain. Mickey was my friend and my heart is breaking. Being in this place everyday affords me the opportunity to know so many wonderful people. I am so blessed by the relationships that have been built over the past 2 years, but at the same time having so many more relationships in my life makes the odds greater that loss will occur. It is almost daily that I get to speak with different people about their problems or things going on in their life. Sometimes good and sometimes bad. I get to share in their joy and their pain. Sometimes I'm not sure if it is good or bad, so I think I will just say that it is what it is. I wouldn't trade what I do here for anything in the world. It is just hard when you are faced with the reality that life is so fragile.
Do any of ever really know what the people we care about are really going through? Could anything stop something like Mickey's death from happening? Could the right words or actions have changed the course of events that robbed us of him? Could anyone or anthing made a difference? Did he say anything the last time I saw him that should have made me question what was going on? I see so many people everyday (we all do), how do you know when someone is in trouble? God I just don't understand. I hate trying to find answers to questions that just don't have answers. I guess if we just didn't love others we would feel pain, but I can't see where that would be worth it. I guess the only two choices you have in life is to pull away from everyone and everything so you don't get hurt, or face the reality that when you open yourself up to another person you are going to feel the joy and the pain. I think that quote goes that it is better to have loved and lost then to never have loved at all. That is true, but when the hurt is so strong I think most people question it validity.
Thanks to all of you who cared enough to read this rambling little note. I care so much about all of the people who have been here supporting this business and trusting me with your friendship. The last 2 years have never been about business. For me it is about being here in this moment. Helping others when I can help and hopefully making some sort of difference before it's all said and done. The people in my life mean everything to me and there is not much I wouldn't do. May you all find peace in bad times, joy in sad times and be greatful for each other all the time.
Categories: My Thoughts